Here’s What Happens When You Get Insecure

If I want to feel differently about myself or my life…I know I need to get myself around the people that are up to big things in their lives. My insecurities about my appearance, success, intelligence or whatever melt away when I’m reminded how little that matters in the grand scheme of things.

I was visiting family today that I hadn’t seen in a few years. Out for lunch, we snapped photos and caught up with one another. When I took a look at the photos a few hours later, I felt my cheeks get warm as I felt embarrassed at the way I looked.

How many times have I let my own negative opinion of myself block me?

It affects the way I dress, the way I speak to clients, the way I flirt with strangers. I know a part of me is holding out for the moment when I’ve morphed my appearance into the most attractive version of myself to make bold moves. I resist asking for the date or quoting a client with my “happiest rate.”

This was part of the reason why my last relationship broke down. My lack of esteem undermined the way I communicated (or failed to), made love and fought for the survival of the relationship.

It’s embarrassing to think how much my vanity influences my actions, words and behaviors. Is this partly natural, because I’m a human being with an ego, or is this a personal block I’ve dismissed for a very long time?

For me, that’s what “living with wild abandon” or “living to my fullest potential” means. It’s about becoming aware of the subtle self-limitations I’ve been living with and letting them go, one by one.

How often have you avoided saying or doing something because of how you felt about yourself?

Maybe it was that shirt you were going to wear out last weekend, but then decided it didn’t look right.

Or maybe it was the quote you were going to give to your new business prospect that you marked down at the last minute.

Or was it the raise you know you deserve, but can’t find the “right” moment to ask for it?

For every moment you hold yourself back, your vitality dims.

You might have been doing it for so long now you don’t remember what it was like to feel so alive—so juicy and in-the-moment—that you could kiss strangers and dance barefoot and jump on a plane to another country without batting an eye. Or whatever it means to you to live with true freedom, in wild abandon and appreciation for Your Life.

Right now, exactly as you’re standing or sitting while you read this, imagine what it looks like to live in your fullest expression. What do you wear when you know you’re hot? Where do you go?

I have a secret for you.

Ready for it?

Here’s the secret: the moment you’re waiting for, the moment when everything is “right” so you can live like that…

The moment is now.

The moment only really ever is now.

There’s absolutely no assurance that you’re going to even be around to live for another moment. So if you’re waiting, you’re losing the opportunity to know what it’s like to live in your fullest expression.

Most of us don’t even know what that really means. I’m here reminding you that there’s no time to waste in figuring it out. Once you know what you’re holding yourself back from, you can tell your ego to take a break. Tell your ego you’re fine right now, exactly as you are, and it’s time to make some waves.

 

 

 

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